I give up
Click the above to hear the music I listened to while I wrote this post.
I have this little rose plant in my bathroom and every few months it loses all of it’s leaves. The first time it happened I thought I had killed it, but I watered it faithfully until one day I noticed a new bud. Then another and another. Until a few weeks later it was beautiful again. In fact it was bigger and better than before.
I have read more than one comment or blog about quitting because people don’t like the format, or the tone of the guides, or the requirements. Do I like them? NO, I do not. However, I know that my petals have fallen and I know it is a good thing. I am trusting the process and moving forward.
Yesterday I went into my bathroom and my little rose plant had lost all of it’s leaves again. Overnight. I took a moment and stared at it. It was bare. It was naked. It was raw. It was vulnerable. It is how I feel. But I know if I keep watering I will bloom again, and I will be bigger and better than ever.
That is how I feel this week. I feel like the more I make myself do the exercises the more I resist it. I suspect it is part of change, but it is rather uncomfortable to say the least. It feels like withdrawal symptoms. Confession time: It is already Thursday and I haven’t done my chore and I skipped two days of exercises AND I haven’t done my DMP revision for the week. As an excuse I was sick and my 2 boys were sick, but I know that is just an excuse.
I will push through this feeling and hope it eases as I go.
Do it now, Drichelle.
I am curious – are others feeling this as well?
It’s a beautiful day!
It’s funny because after reading several different blogs I realized a lot of people seem to be having emotional/family/spiritual/etc. issues. Yesterday my car broke down, I got two flat tires (separate from my car breaking down), and my washing machine broke. Normally I would have that old attitude of Well shit, look at all this bad stuff that is happening to me. However, I chose to have a different attitude and it has made such a huge difference. I said to myself What can I learn from all this? How can I react differently? I realize the things I listed were minor, but that is how I USED to think.
I was so thankful I made some extra time to learn how to navigate the MKMMS site. There is so much helpful information there. I just needed to take the time to do it!
I am enjoying the reading, cards, blue rectangles etc. I seem to be chanting to myself do it now! or retrain your brain! anytime I try to put something off.
The only thing I haven’t gotten in every day is that mid-day reading. I’ll create that habit. I will start setting an alarm, which should help.
I am looking forward to Sunday!
Hello Blogging World,
This is officially my very first blog into cyber space. Although most people think all things computer related just magically float through the air, it is much more complicated than that. Everything is actually stored on earth, not in a magical cloud.
I completed my first version of my DMP today and it was exactly three sentences long. I hemmed and hawed over how to make it longer, but finally typed it out and hit send. I have a feeling my guide will send it back straight away asking for more. It’s the more I seem to have an issue with lately. I am an 1, 2, 3, type person and filling in the blanks is hard. I am working on it. Especially since I feel I should write something….like a book. Which is what I put on my DMP. It just came out so I went with it. I wonder if I change my mind in the coming weeks if that will be accepted.
I feel lost and hope it eases as I feel my way through the dark…